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When the boundless affection hides the trap of manipulation: love bombing is an enticement technique typical of narcissistic people and can occur not only in a loving relationship but also in family and friends relationships.
What is love bombing
Love bombing, translated as love bombing, is one intense manifestation of affection and love that hides the intention to take advantage of the victim, obtaining a great influence on it to the point of almost plagiarizing and controlling it. A real psychological violence. It is a type of behavior carried out by an extremely narcissistic person who tries to attract attention to himself in every way, devaluing the other and relying above all on the emotional fragility of the victim and on the latter’s sense of guilt.
It is mainly weak people who fall into the trap of love bombing, with low self-esteem, who suffer from loneliness and who are in great need of love. We talk about love bombing not just in a couple relationship but also in groups, friendships or even in the family.
The term love bombing in fact, it was created precisely to designate the manipulation strategies implemented by seven which depopulated in the seventies of the last century, especially in the United States.
It is the era of the New Age, during which people sought the liberation of the body and mind through innovative techniques and doctrines, alternative medicines but also new lifestyles and philosophies. In this context, sects, spiritual or otherwise, were born, involving a large number of people all over the world: not all of them had noble aims and almost all, to lure the followers, implemented love bombing strategies. To speak of love bombing for the first time is the scholar Margaret Singer in 1995, who in his book Cults in our midst describes in detail the strategies of enticement and recruitment of groups and sects.
What is love bombing: how to recognize it
How to recognize love bombing, whether it takes place in a couple relationship or in other contexts? First of all, you should know that love bombing essentially consists of two stages. In a first phase, the narcissistic subject who implements the seduction strategy does everything to attract the victim into his network. It does this by giving it immense attention and great affection. In a second moment, however, there is a sudden decrease in attention, which leads to quarrels, scenes and jealousy attacks even for futile reasons but above all if the victim tries to escape the narcissist’s network by dedicating time to himself.
The love bomber at this point will try to hug the victim, accusing her of being the problem and the cause of the quarrels and misunderstandings and convincing her above all focusing on the sense of guilt of the same. A dangerous mechanism that can also lead the victim to depression. The victim, who is usually a weak and insecure person, will try to understand and forgive the love bomber despite being hurting him.
What is love bombing: how to defend yourself
Love bombing creates toxic relationships that lead to disturbing psychological consequences on the victim. Defending oneself is often not easy and not even recognizing the signs before they have resulted in already serious consequences. The victim will be able to free himself from the narcissist’s net only with his own strength, analyzing your own situation well e to clarify itself before trying to get away from the person who wanted to trap her. This is a fundamental step in freeing yourself from the trap of love bombing. It is often appropriate and useful too contact support figures, such as a psychologist or trusted people. Finally, it is important not to hesitate to turn away from these narcissistic people: indecision it could lead to a relapse into the trap, which could become even tighter and more oppressive.
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